build confidence in body, mind & spirit.
LET YOUR TRUE SELF SHINE.
Self-esteem Therapy
Online therapy for adults & sensitive persons in Santa Barbara + across CA & MI
You are your own worst enemy.
it feels like nothing you do is ever good enough.
You doubt, question, criticize, and talk to yourself in a way that you would never talk to another person. You notice every flaw or mistake, in yourself and maybe in others too. Guilt is something you feel regularly, making it hard to say no or do what you really want to do. You are having a hard time living up to your own standards; you’re fearful of letting the ball drop and can’t take time to celebrate your wins. I mean, are they really wins if you haven’t finished your to-do list yet or if you didn’t do your task perfectly? You fear conflict, have difficulty speaking up for yourself and tolerate annoying or even hurtful and unhealthy behavior in your relationships way more often than you’d like to admit.
LIFE IS LOSING ITS LUSTER AND YOUR FACADE OF “OK” IS SLIPPING.
Perhaps you:
Feel not good enough around friends, constantly comparing yourself or wondering why they even hang out with you.
Think you’ll never find someone who really loves you and dating just seems pointless. Why even swipe right if they’re just going to ghost you anyway?
Feel criticized, slighted, rejected, or manipulated by others which makes it hard to feel secure at work, school or your social life.
Avoid letting others help you; you don’t want to be a burden or fear they will likely let you down anyway.
Feel obligated to do what others need even when you don’t really have the capacity. As a result you feel drained and sometimes even resentful.
Feel tired, frazzled, run down, and it’s getting harder and harder to keep up. You keep a mental tally of all you haven’t been able to accomplish and life doesn’t feel as satisfying as you hoped.
Avoid trying new things or taking action on your goals and inspirations due to self doubt, indecision, and fears of failure or not being good enough.
Together we’ll uncover your inner strength & let your light SHINE.
Imagine feeling confident in yourself and your ability to manage life’s inevitable ups and downs. You are managing stress, it’s no longer controlling you. Big emotions no longer dominate your day-to-day experience and you find it easier to tune into your true needs, feelings, and desires.
You are feeling connected, genuine and authentic in your relationships, which includes space for your feelings and needs, and saying NO. You feel content in yourself, no matter what others may think of you. Being your own ally when times are tough is becoming your natural stance and you believe in your inherent worthiness.
You’ve stopped “playing small” and hiding yourself, are taking new strides and expanding your life to include more of what’s important to you. Confidence and self-trust are growing steadily and you know how to discern your inner wisdom from your fearful ego.
Life is taking new shape and feels more fulfilling. You are manifesting the life you desire through your intention, receptivity, commitment to growth, and restoring your connection to your authentic self.
Here’s what we’ll do together
Therapy paves the way toward freedom, confidence, connection, & ease …
Imagine feeling confident in yourself and your ability to manage life’s inevitable ups and downs. You are managing stress, it’s no longer controlling you. Big emotions no longer dominate your day-to-day experience and you find it easier to tune into your true needs, feelings, and desires.
You are feeling connected, genuine and authentic in your relationships, which includes space for your feelings and needs, and saying NO. You feel content in yourself, no matter what others may think of you. Being your own ally when times are tough is becoming your natural stance and you believe in your inherent worthiness.
You’ve stopped “playing small” and hiding yourself, are taking new strides and expanding your life to include more of what’s important to you. Confidence and self-trust are growing steadily and you know how to discern your inner wisdom from your fearful ego.
Life is taking new shape and feels more fulfilling. You are manifesting the life you desire through your intention, receptivity, commitment to growth, and restoring your connection to your authentic self.
Therapy for self-esteem combines understanding with tools to strengthen, harmonize, & promote change.
what to expect:
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With curiosity and compassion, we will identify and explore beliefs that you have about yourself, others, and the world to understand how those impact how you feel and what you choose.
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New perceptions and possibilities. I will support you through discussion and experiential practices and skills to assist you in letting go of beliefs and patterns that no longer serve you, creating new pathways in the brain that align with your highest self.
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A healthier sense of self, based on respect, compassion, empathy, and self trust. Improving self care, aligning with your values, and loving yourself in a deep way beyond just words.
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Learn to identify and act on your own unique values, boundaries, feelings and needs. We will explore and enhance boundaries, communication, and the ability to act on your innate wisdom and to recalibrate more easily when life inevitably knocks you off center.
At the end of the day, I want you to know:
You are inherently worthy and deserving EXACTLY as you are.
it truly is possible
Therapy for self-esteem can help you …
Feel more confidence in yourself and your ability to act on what’s important to you
Know how to find your truth amidst the opinions of others
Help you feel empowered in living according to your needs and values
Calm the inner critic and lean into your true worth and inner beauty
Feel inspired in life again; a life that’s truly meaningful to you
Trust your own ebb and flow, knowing when you get knocked off center, that you will indeed find your way back to a calm and clear mind
Say no, possibly even without guilt, and achieve better balance in your relationships
Questions?
FAQs
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Self-esteem is the foundation of wellness and affects all areas of our lives. It influences both our mental health and also our physical health. People with positive self esteem tend to have greater resilience to stress and adversity, recover more quickly when going through difficulty, and overall feel more positively in life.
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The inner critic refers to our internal voice that criticizes, judges, demeans, and belittles, or calls you names. We all have one, though some people find their inner critic is more pronounced and persistent. It tends to magnify mistakes or perceived flaws, compare you to others, deem your efforts inadequate, inflate failures and can lead to procrastination, avoidance, perfectionism, and is typically a significant factor in anxiety and depression. It often stems from trauma, challenging early life experiences, and may also be influenced by societal and cultural norms and pressures.
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Not necessarily. Most inner critics are pushing, goading, belittling, and cutting you down, which over time erodes self-esteem, confidence, and your overall well-being. It's easy to confuse a familiar voice with one that’s helpful. They are not one and the same. You will learn to distinguish between your inner ally that can be constructive in its feedback with one that is hurtful and not in alignment with your true self.
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Achieving can be a wonderful trait or skill when it’s in balance. However, perfectionism and over-achieving typically stem from a place of anxiety, fear, and “not good enough.” Therefore, it becomes compulsive and rigid in its nature. Over time, this leads to chronic stress and burnout, which can significantly impact both physical and mental health, leading to depression and anxiety.
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Absolutely not. Though calming the inner critic may help you re-evaluate your goals and see if they’re actually in alignment with your desires vs "shoulds" or the expectations of others. So possibly your goals could shift, but you will not inherently lose motivation if you are “softer” with yourself. In fact, you’ll likely find the opposite! That your creative energy, mood, and motivation will soar.